"Be ready by 11"
> 11 arrives
“We wont pick you up until noon”
> noon arrives
“Give us a half hour we are hungry and are gonna eat”

I love my bf but holy shit I could have slept in

mozzazzella:

almightykushlord:

Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told , one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to  and f*** , the local media are reporting exclusively.

“Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.

In further discussions with journalists from the media, the  stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”

“If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.

The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.

“Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.

THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE

as much as what’s being said is true and as much as everyone would like to believe this is real, it’s completely not. it originated from a satirical news source before other news sources got a hold of it and changed the age to all sorts of different numbers. honestly, you can tell there’s something satirical in nature about the article from just reading it. just the whole attitude and tone of the story gives it away. this is why it’s important to source-check and fact-check. :^/

Damnit I love over the knee socks/stockings and thigh highs but I have big legs and I dont feel as confident as I should… :C

shubbabang:

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would you believe this has happened more than once ahah gee whiz

damngruchy:

supermassiveasshole:

i was teaching my grandma to use computer so we can talk on skype and such but today she went kinda mad at me because “i didnt show her the knitting programme” and i was like what

and it comes out she accidentally opened ms excel and found out its a great way to create knitting patterns

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my grandma is 82

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(Source: supermassiveasshole)